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In a recent mentoring session, my student asked for my assistance to help him create a breakthrough in his finances. He is a young lawyer who had difficulty getting hired at a law firm. As a result, he decided to start his own practice.
"It opened up a world of new possibilities, a world of abundance."
A snippet of our conversation follows.
Me: So how is it going with your practice?
He: Not good financially. However, I met someone recently who asked for my help in starting a nonprofit organization.
Me: That is a great start. How much are you charging for your work?
He: Nothing. I am doing it for free.
Me: That is noble of you.
He: I believe in the cause.
Me: That is wonderful. What is this person giving you in exchange for your time, effort, experience? Are you sure there isn’t another reason why you are not charging your client anything for your service, especially when you are so financially challenged?
After some contemplation on his part, he finally confessed.
He: The truth is that I don’t know what to charge for my services.
Now we are getting somewhere.
Me: Close your eyes and ask yourself, “If I felt worthy, what would I charge for my services?”
Within 30 seconds, his facial expression immediately transformed. The clouds of his mind parted as the sunshine of his self-worth shone through. He opened his eyes and clearly announced without a hint of hesitation “$200/hour.”
He: I realize now why I wasn’t able to get hired or to find clients, and why I did not want to charge this new client anything for all my effort. I did not feel worthy. I did not even consider my worth.
And because of that, he did not create the vessel (i.e. boundaries and conditions) necessary to manifest his financial abundance!
"Your sense of worth is completely in your own hands."
Setting healthy boundaries is a key component in developing one’s self worth. The moment this young man realized that he could create a healthy boundary, it opened up a world of new possibilities, a world of abundance in which he could safely and happily exchange energy (like his services for money) with other people.
Many people blame their sense of unworthiness on events in their past or present. Don’t let this stop you from connecting to your own sense of worth. No matter what was said or done to you, your sense of worth - now and always, is completely in your own hands.
The importance of maintaining one’s worthiness, no matter what, can be found in the story of Joseph in the “Handbook of Humanity” (aka, the Torah/Bible). At the tender age of 17, Joseph’s brothers were jealous of him. They hated him to the point that they sold into slavery!
He did not let that affect his self-worth. As a slave on his new master’s estate, he did such a great job, that he was eventually promoted to running the household and business ventures of his master. He never thought of himself as a slave. He was proactive in everything he did. At the height of his career, he made a choice to do a spiritual action. He resisted the seductions of his master’s wife. As a result, he was accused of a crime that he did not commit and spent 12 years in the dungeon! He never thought of himself as a victim. He was proactive in everything he did.
In spite of his traumatic experiences, he never defined himself by his circumstances, but by his connection to his Higher Self (aka, The Light Force of the Creator), the Big Picture.
By choosing to focus on his internal connection with the Light Force within, rather than define himself according to other people’s opinions or his environment, Joseph was, is, and always will be a role model for living a rich and proactive life. Joseph ended up in control of all the wealth of Egypt.
Let’s more closely examine this story. At the time of his act of restriction, the Torah, our guide of our internal world, gives him the title of ‘Joseph the Righteous’.
In the material world, however, Joseph, as a result of his proactive response to the situation, is then falsely accused of a crime and promptly thrown in the dungeon. It is a paradox. Two realities existing at the same time. The lesson here is that in life we are always presented with a paradox. In any given circumstance we have the choice of defining ourselves from the perspective of our soul or our ego. Which perspective would you choose?
If you want to strengthen your proactive nature, and manifest more joy, self-esteem, and abundance, I personally recommend this kabbalistic tool:
Scan the Aramaic letter sequences in the Zohar portions of Miketz and Vayigash, and also study them. Studying the lessons of scripture through the kabbalistic explanations feeds the soul – which it desperately needs to do its work of restriction!
This, of course, would require time and effort on your part. But, that’s ok, because Honey, you’re worth it!